Yesterday I slept close to Ma. She was talking in her sleep and snoring loudly.
I finally made my way into my room at 3 am and fell asleep.
I love Arun deeply. There is a fear of losing him and being rejected by him. There is a fear of being dejected and sad and poor.
There is a fear that I might not make it into the heavenly realms. Why do these fears beset me?
I have been meditating on love. I genuinely deeply care for Arun and love him. He has been giving me mixed signals. He is so adorable, so Uber cute and lovely.
I think I'll sit and work on my novel now after having a bath. I hope my fears have no basis. I hope our association is long, Lovely and warm.
When I was in Chennai at the age of 33 an astrologer had told me that at the age of 38 I would meet a married man who would likely be my lifelong partner. I met Arun at the age of 38.
The astrologer said I would be happy with him and fall in love with him and that I should not hesitate to take my relationship further with this man.
So much for the prophesied. Is there any Truth In these predictions? Sivasankaran uncle had told me that this astrologer makes the right predictions.
I absolutely adore Arun and I pray for his wife and children. I hope our love amounts to something beautiful. He is amazing. He is a sweetheart. He is noble and regal and absolutely fascinating.
Needless to say I tell him I love him at least ten times a day.
Patience has its virtues.
Let's see which way the tide is flowing?
Let's see how long the road is ahead?
Let's look to the rainbow and wish upon a star.
Wish that my heart at the end of it all remains intact and warm.
Love,
Doel
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