Journal 18.5.2023 9.12 pm

Dear Journal,

I am loathe to switch on my laptop right now. I would rather go to sleep after meditating and a little light yoga, and of course after eating dinner.

Ma is literally addicted to her phone. She and Buro are always on their phone. Buro at least reads. Ma is glued to WhatsApp. There is no real conversation in this house. I'm far too critical I feel.

I hope Bu is doing well. As in well in every way. I hope his health is fine, and that his finances are fine, and that we get along all our lives. Today, I checked out digicams on Amazon. It's been my wish to buy one for myself.

I think from today May 18 to August 20 I won't buy any luxuries.

I'm quite the spendthrift. I've spent so much money on clothes. I must budget and I must quit smoking. I can at least chase one goal. The no spending goal is a good one. Then I'll extend it further.

Also, I want to be able to put  at least 15k in ppf, 10k to PA, and 5k to ma on her birthday.

I wonder what people think of me. Apart from a few people I'm not really in touch with anyone from school and college.

I hope to make new friends.

I hope to make real meaningful connections.

I hope to live a fulfilling life.

Love,

Me.

I am grateful for my bed and my Conybio mat. It aids me to sleep deeply each night.

I am grateful for yoga. It strengthens me physically and spiritually.

I am grateful for my job. It's a huge blessing.

I am grateful for my beautiful wonderful life.

I am grateful for Bu, Sadhya, and Melon.

I am grateful for the equanimity of my mind.

I am grateful for my heart that has felt full and whole in the past.

I am grateful for great friends.

I am grateful that I write. I don't know how well I write, but I enjoy it, and that matters the most.

I am grateful for dimma, dadu, thama.

I'm grateful for all the deceased in my life. I pray for them to be born in better circumstances.

I am grateful for my beautiful brain. 

I am grateful for my beautiful heart and lungs.

I am grateful for my wonderful body.

9.28 pm