I had a terrible fight with Arun yesterday. He kicked me out of Bottles saying i never make amends and he wants to be left alone. He is so controlling!
Then he called me and said we'll meet soon. And i messaged him saying let's meet after 6 months. In the moment i meant it. I need the space and the distance.
That escalated into something so nasty. He said things like he wants me out of his life, that he doesn't know what he saw in me.
And that proves i need distance.
Throughout the evening he was disrespectful. He called me a rebound from his ex who he said he was deeply in love with.
He is so manipulative, so controlling and yesterday i felt deeply disrespected. I felt so gloomy through the evening!
He is so harsh and he didn't say one nice thing to me yesterday. He only criticised and complained.
Anyhow our zadankai went very well today and I'm so grateful for that.
I think I'll stop talking to Arun. I don't need him. And this just proves that just because you love someone it doesn't mean that they are good for you.
Even though i didn't mean to reject him, i was just protecting myself he completely went ballistic yesterday and said he doesn't love me etc. Etc.
There is no hope. I don't know if i should seek a friendship.
I shouldn't be with someone who disrespects me. That is toxic.
I am feeling:
Heart hurt
Reasonably ok even though i didn't sleep very well last night
I am too emotional. Wish i had a more practical brain. I feel a lot!
Love,
Me.
I am grateful for God's infinite love, grace and blessings on my life.
4.53 pm
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