A very merry Christmas to me and everybody!
I woke up around 7 today from a dream where i saw myself completing writing a book filled with my paintings with Ma encouraging me.
I then paused for 20 minutes before i went to do yoga, pranayam, meditation and chanting.
I delayed my first cigarette.
Ma came to watch me do yoga so i couldn't take a cigarette break and i'm so grateful for that!
I'm back home and i'm oil pulling while writing this. Yesterday as i was writing Bhuda and Pipi came home. I made them tea. Bhuda is so loving. Pipi is so sweet.
Her digits have suffered from an onslaught of arthritis.
Then i attended the Nica meeting. After that i had such a wave of grief over how Pa has been treating me. I messaged N.
And i smoked 7 cigarettes after that to stabilise myself.
Then N called me up and said it's alright. And a lady from Nica (Minakshi) called me up and asked me to keep attending meetings and that i would definitely quit cigarettes. She has been sobre for over 15 months.
I danced to music after that as Ma came home late. I needed to do that. Just dance. I heard a lot of newage music and I'm so grateful for that.
I shared a few songs with A.
I am feeling:
Happy
Loving
Sobre (i just had two cigarettes)
Was feeling a little pained (but that's in the background now)
I am grateful for my morning routine.
I think i'll pack my bag and then sit and write.
Tarot reading just hasn't happened.
I am grateful for God's infinite love, grace and blessings on my life.
I am grateful for my mother who is the darlingest mother in the history of Mothers, my sweet Pa and my brave brother.
Love,
Me.
8.58 am
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